•Hellos everyone its ReZ again and Guineamon has requested to be a guest poster so yea. He came up with a humor creation myth and here it is:
A long time ago, there was a massive computer floating in nothingness. But one day, a Trojan infected it, and thus Chaos was born. It crashed the computer and rolled it into a ball, becoming the Earth. However, in doing so, it released a anti-virus hidden in the gargantuan computer, the Joe’ Humphray, which subdued the Trojan into the core of the Earth, surrounding it with a strong firewall, which is the reason why the center of the Earth is hot. With the virus subdued, Joe’ Humphray set to work building his new planet. It was dark, so he poured Tabasco© sauce onto what was the old monitor, turning it into the sun. But it got lonely and created Barney, which died from an illness soon after, and Hasbro© spawned from its corpse. They cut pieces of earth up to make lead paint, and when their sales manager died, they cried for days, creating the sea. Seeing that Hasbro© needed a purpose, Joe’Humphray created man from stale Oreo cookies and woman from the milk he was dipping the cookies into.
A long time ago, there was a massive computer floating in nothingness. But one day, a Trojan infected it, and thus Chaos was born. It crashed the computer and rolled it into a ball, becoming the Earth. However, in doing so, it released a anti-virus hidden in the gargantuan computer, the Joe’ Humphray, which subdued the Trojan into the core of the Earth, surrounding it with a strong firewall, which is the reason why the center of the Earth is hot. With the virus subdued, Joe’ Humphray set to work building his new planet. It was dark, so he poured Tabasco© sauce onto what was the old monitor, turning it into the sun. But it got lonely and created Barney, which died from an illness soon after, and Hasbro© spawned from its corpse. They cut pieces of earth up to make lead paint, and when their sales manager died, they cried for days, creating the sea. Seeing that Hasbro© needed a purpose, Joe’Humphray created man from stale Oreo cookies and woman from the milk he was dipping the cookies into.
•But when humans appeared, they had to make attractive toys, so they stopped crying, and created cable television, using clichéd characters like Dora the Explorer in their toy production. They dug deep into the Earth one day in order to gather more lead paint, and a portion of the Trojan escaped, which manifested into George Bush, who mated with the drug dealer Ash Ketchum, and Republicans were born. They made a plan to kill Joe’Humphray, which involved stuffing poisoned cocaine into Powerpuff Girls and feeding them to Joe’Humphray
•Sensing his death was near, Joe’ Humphray created Gary Coleman, William Shatner and Democrats. William Shatner starred in Star Trek and recorded it into a DVD, sending it to Gary Coleman to mate with, and thus Ewoks were born. The Democrats ressurected Darth Maul, an avid Manchester United fan, and told him the Republicans had laughed at Man U. With the awesome leadership of Maul, the Ewoks took over the world, and Democrats took their place in parliament. However, George Bush and Democrat friend Ronald Mcdonalds could not be killed, so the Democrats created Law, trapping the two in a never ending spiral of lawsuits, with Boston Legal being produced soon after.
•Gary Coleman and William Shatner married and sought enlightenment together, creating a new religion known as WoW. They reached enlightenment soon after and became GM’s, and released an expansion pack soon after, which unified the people under the banner of Joe’Humphray