My senses are failing

Maybe the 'true fear' quiz has some truth in it. Somehow i just get so easily affected by whats happening to those around me. Its over damnit. Let it be.

I dont know.

My mom is gonna scream at me for sleeping late again in about slightly more than 1 hour's time. Why dont i just go sleep earlier then?

If it were that simple.

Funny how nothing has happened yet but i already doomed it to happen.

I cant seem to do anything, lose all my will to do things, when stuff happen. I cant focus i cant do anything. From mugging to QT. I would just want to laze around the whole day if i could, not giving a damn about anything.

I wish that i could wave my hand and everyone's troubles would go away.

I wish i could wave my hand and it will all be over.

But its called escaping from reality, and it doesnt do any good.

I want to be like Paul. Or Christ for that matter. Its want i truly want and i can feel it in my heart.

But sometimes, i just cant do it. No matter how hard i try, or how much i pray. But im not saying its God's fault. Because i can feel it, its something in me. I bet Eugene will pop out an msn convo and tell me to keep praying or something but you know, i kinda know all that already. No use telling me again.

Gotta pinpoint that problem and trash it.

Ahh what the heck. I dont even know what im saying anymore. Im just typing whatever comes into my mind. And it doesnt make sense. Im jumping around everywhere, not even knowing what im thinking. Im confused myself. Like. a combination of many things im feeling.

Screw it. Dont try to understand it coz even i dont myself.