NPAP finito

So its finally over!!

Lol changed my facebook status back to normal =D.

I guess it does feel good to finally end it. Well today's NPAP was alot better and no im not giving the politically correct answer. As in its seriously better than uhm i dont know. Fri? Wed?

Then again, of course you're supposed to be getting better not worse. Lalalalala.

Anyway now i can finally go back to slack rawr. Oh wait exams in 2 weeks. Meh.

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Well i guess maybe to some people this may appear to be ironic but i really thank God for the unforseen event that happened today.

You see, this isnt the first time.

I mean hey. The whole reason why there are only 40+ posts here are because the other 700 are buried somewhere else. And the only reason why they are buried somewhere else is because of something that happened that is similar to what happened today.

Thrice in a year already.

The first time, it was like 'eh what... kk whatever i go change it since ppl dont like it' but it wasnt really like coz i felt that i need to change it but i just didnt want trouble. Second time was when i was pretty pissed after megacamp in which a number of ppl know the story of Timbatku. That was pissing but it was like 'kk fine whatever i dont care'.

When it happens THREE times, I think its time to wake up.

Well i guess this one is the swiftest one and also the most heated one thus far (and hopefully the most from now on cause there aint gonna be anymore).

Well hunting back my posts, i cant really find reference to saying 'they suck' and when i reread the grammar one i thought it was pretty alright, just a seemingly innocent comment on other people's use of language.

But i guess the fact is that even if I think its normal, its ok, it doesnt mean that others think so. I would like to really say that the grammar thing was NEVER intended to be looking down on anyone. Its like yea so you got this problem sometimes with language and its rather amusing but im not trying to mock you or anything.

Still, im not gonna argue right or wrong, fact is, it affected someone so heres my apologies.

As for the other issue, the 'they suck' issue, i was thinking about it and yes. You're right. Even if they suck horribly, they are horrendous, does it give me the right to say it? Besides, like I said, they're lance cops. They have much less training over the years in comparison. How good was I when I was a lance cop?

And i thought about it and some things really hit me.

For one, so what if you're the best, the greatest, but your attitude sucks, what does that count to you?

Pride and arrogance.

And I guess at that moment it really only revolved around issues at that situation. I was abit sour that you know, why the heck again?

It was kinda disturbing me before the parade started, so much so that i felt like perhaps i should just fall out and let someone else take over me. But I guess i wanted to march in that parade after all the stuff we've been through.

So i just prayed and asked that I can just focus and give my best in the parade and not be distracted by other matters, and in whatever I do, I dedicate it to the Lord. I did feel much calmer after that.

And slowly throughout the parade (you know there were lots of time of stoning so yea haha) and after, my thoughts developed more and then finally the full thing really really hit me.

It isnt about this event and what I said about it. That is insignificant in comparison.

What we're talking about here is a lifestyle. That when it comes to sin, I always think 'ok we dont fall into temptation' and stuff and yea. You resist sexual temptation, let go of hate, learn to be more forgiving. And striving to do all that, you forgot the basics.

Humility.

Honesty, recently I feel a lil drained spiritually. I was praying the other day that God will reveal to me what I need to change in my life for the better. I guess at that moment I kinda expected a 'poof' and suddenly i know it thing. But that didnt happen.

So well. A couple of days later and the least expected moment, I learnt a valuable life lesson.

I dont know, if i were to talk about my entire experience, from how I felt at the beginning to now, i'll take me 1 hr so im not inclined to do so. But just a few things.

First, perhaps because i always couldnt fully express myself face to face, so behind this computer screen, my words and thoughts flow freely. I also have always been a rather critical person so combine that together, ta da. No excuses though.

Secondly, often I try to bring love and joy into the lives of friends. I do my best to cheer them up when they are down, I encourage them, I show care and concern. But what about those people who arent that close to us? Dont they too deserve our respect?

Thirdly, God is faithful, that even when we fall away, he will bring us back.

Fourthly, how can we claim to be Christians when we do not follow Chirst, when our words, thoughts, deeds do not mirror Christ? If we say that we are Christians, and yet we disappoint others, we bring grief into the lives of others, how dare we call ourslves such a term? The best way to bring the word of God into the lives of others, the best way is to first shine our light as true diciples of Christ.

And perhaps most importantly, who are we to judge others? Who are we to be arrogant in the things we do well when these things, these talents are all given by the grace of God and just as he can give it, he cant take away. If we have anything to bost in, we boast in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

To live a life that truely glorifies the name of the Lord, to be a reflector of his love. Thank you Lord, for the little events in life that mould us to become who you want us to be.