Looks like I've been posting alot since I came back. This is apparently my fourth post the day, though the first one was because it was past midnight before I slept.
Then again, I have to post this. Keeping track I guess. I needed time to think through this and now I have, it might repeat some of the things I've said, but only to make it clearer.
This one is about being in primers.
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I joined primers and attended regularly yes, and it is even more interesting that the main reason why I was with primers was because of CE. I am not going for any award other than NYAA (gold), of which almost none of the sections I am doing under BB. I barely even claim CAS from BB. Sure I had friends in BB and that was one reason why I joined, but not why I continued to come.
I came because I enjoyed the insightful bible study, because I wanted to worship together with fellow Christians, for BB has many who are devoted to Christ, a clear distinction I feel to the many of those who are only so in name. All in all, the single largest reason why I have always been in primers is because I hoped to grow more in Christ. Seems great isnt it?
But BB was never my battlefield.
I didn't attend prayer meetings. I went to the first, it was all about spiritual blueprints and whats not, it was all about BB stuff, which to be honest I really didn't care about. After awhile, I went to another, and it was the same. I never attended a single prayer meeting after that.
You see, BB was like, a distant armory perhaps. I went there to equip myself with weapons to prepare myself for battle, but I never fought for BB. I took the things they offered to me and never returned to it, but used it in my other battlefield.
DI was my battlefield, it was where I fought for God. Fighting on this other front was never on my mind.
I didnt really want to go for LDC, CAW or coy camp. Of course, I didnt detest it, it was more of 'I rather not but since its compulsory so whatever'. These BB activities just didn't have any significance to me.
But coy camp completely changed my perspective. I didn't like having to stay with our groups even in our bunks. By the third day, I felt that it wasn't enough. Coy camp ended at 930, but I asked my parents to come down at 10. I wanted to just, stay a little while longer.
It just didnt feel right. All this time spent, it feels like there is so much still left untapped into. And at the end of coy camp I just wondered.
Its over?
Theres no more BB for the rest of the year. Thats it. I may have added my group members on facebook, but who knows if we would ever really communicate again?
Suddenly it seemed to be that I have another front to fight in. There are lives here, precious people loved by God, whom I can be a blessing to. Even in the course of this, they have been a blessing to me. It seemed like what I have been doing is really nothing, and now awakened to this reality, I am compelled. I must.
Which is why im glad theres Galatia gathering coming up despite there being no BB. I definitely wouldn't have gone for it originally, but now its something I feel strongly about. I enjoy spending time with these people. Its weird, but I feel a connection to them despite barely knowing them.
Sometimes its a common occurance for me to tend to judge people, but somehow this time, I can't. I just see people whom I want to see, as mighty warriors in Christ, from whatever they may be now. Some don't know Him, some are still growing, some are already giants. Yet no matter what, I want to see them transcending what they are today.
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Living for God is not something we can confine to specific areas of our lives. The battlefields we fight upon are across all aspects. Even beyond DI, beyond BB and all that. We fight for the nameless man upon the streets. I am not accountable for people in my group, to the guys in kairos. I am primarily accountable to God, and it is stemming from there that I will reach out to these people.
Reaching out. I used to think of it as evangelism, but extending that, its going in the love of Christ, to make a difference in the lives of others. Impacting destinies is not merely about bringing people to Christ, it is also about taking them deeper. It is also about standing by them.
Somethings thats been upon my heart recently. How can we live our lives in a manner such that when people think of us, they think of Christ? I can think of a few people who are so in my life, and I wonder if its possible that I may let my life be as such.
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