Well, Pastor Benny Prasad was the guest speaker for today in Church. Hes a cool guy, there is no dispute about that, because he wears a hat that says 'thank u Jesus I am Indian' =D.
Well the story behind that hat is pretty amusing too, and so are many of his other experiences that he went through. Of course though, him being a cool and funny guy isnt exactly the point, im just saying heh.
I thought something he said today was really appropriate. We are smart people. Lets face it, I am considered one. Even if I am damn shitty at my math HL, the fact that I am allowed to take such a subject at all already puts me in the top tier of the nation. I may not be as smart as my peers in my school, but I am in one of the top schools in the world, where the bottom student is already above the average.
And sometimes, being smart isnt all too good. I know that because I experience that. Even before today, I sometimes wonder if perhaps life will be easier if I actually knew less. You see, intelligence sometimes has a way to act against faith. We think we know alot about the world, and using this understanding we have, it sometimes goes against what we believe as a Christian.
I have been thinking abit about psychology recently and what it may mean for the Christian faith. It is quite a stumbling block to me, and it does cause some struggles in my walk with God (the fact that im forever tired with this endless stream of work is another). Yet I am reminded today about the reality of Christian faith.
I walked with my God. I know. Its funny that we forget so easily the times where God has shown himself to us undeniably. Instead, we allow ourselves in small moments to turn away from Him because we trust more in the worldly wisdom. As intellectual beings, we would rather rely on these things than the God who is above and beyond it all.
Gah, im really tired now, I cant seem to put what I want to say properly in words. Hmm. I dont really know how to explain it, but, I have this conviction in me. Frankly its really annoying that I cant express it.
Sigh alright nevermind. I feel unsatisfied at this section bleh but moving on.
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Another thing. As Christians, we often live such, tame lives. Today reminded me once again that Christianity is not meant to be so tame. Sadly, sometimes in my life I tend to limit myself, not daring to claim that of which I think is quite impossible under the pretext that it may not be in accordance to the will of God, when in reality I just don't have the courage to exercise that faith.
And so here, once again, I declare it. This is the God whom we believe in. That he is the Creator of all things, the Lord over all laws of nature. The things that are natural are only natural because he made them to be so. The things that are supernatural, are as natural to God as any other thing that is natural in our eyes. Miracles are merely a small deviation from the norm, nothing particularly difficult for a God in whom nothing is impossible because impossible doesn't exist. It is only a reason for us not to try.
And we know this, if we have faith as small as a mustard seed, we can move mountains.
We know all these, but we don't necessarily apply them in our lives. Smaller things we would dare to claim by faith, but we sometimes don't dare to claim the bigger things because we are afraid that God won't do do it. Yet why do we sometimes think that God won't do it? Have we subconsciously allowed ourselves to be lulled into this belief that God is limited, even if we do not think those exact words in our heads? Or perhaps we have come to believe that our faith doesn't count for much, that God does whatever he wants on his own without bothering about what we proclaim?
I think of being radical. We look at pastor Benny Prasad, and we may say 'this guy is radical man, hes got great faith'. Yet when you think about it, frankly what did he do? He merely followed what is already proclaimed to every single one of us. As Mr Oliver Loke often puts it, if we want to be radical in our faith, just follow the word of God. Thats as radical a life as we can ever live.
Though I may not stand in the stage and play amazing music or travel all the countries in the world demonstrating the power of God, I know that my life is used by God in my own calling. To each his own, I do not belong to same path as he does and does will not do great things in front of large audiences, but in my own personal life, I desire for that same faith, and its a faith that all Christians are called to have.
I want to dare to believe. I look around me and I know its not just affecting me. In today's society, today's culture, faith seems to be becoming less and less real. The idea of faith now is some imaginary fluff instead of true substance, a replacement when we cannot substantiate rather than the true evidence of what we believe. Thats not faith. That cheapens faith.
So many of us don't dare to believe anymore. So many of us sing 'nothing is impossible' without realising the enormity of what that phrase means, instead taking it only to apply to the smaller things in our lives, things that we do actually to a certain extent think is possible.
The challenge today, take something that really feels impossible, and believe for it to come to pass.
We cannot separate this faith that transcends understanding from Christianity. All is good when the Church learns to love one another, for certainly it is part of the Greatest Commandment. Yet at the same time, if that is the only thing we are going to do, we might as well be a regular social work group. Yes, it is more important to have love, but no, it will not be enough to have only love.
We must move mountains. For how else do we show that the God Almighty reigns?
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One more struggle of mine. Waiting upon God and hearing Him speak. I'd like the have the faith where I can truly walk in step spiritually with Him, guided, prompted by Him.
Yet many a times when God does speak, we don't hear it. I don't hear it. It strikes me sometimes later when I think back about it, or sometimes it occurs to me at the moment but I let it pass. Probably even more often I don't realise it at all and still don't.
I think there are times that God calls us to do something but we dismiss them as if it were foolish. In that, I am reminded of a friend whom recently told a story of how he prepared three food stuffs for someone (cant remember if it was muffin or chocolate or what) and it just came to him that he could do something nice along with it. So along with the gift of the foodstuff, he added in that the three were to represent faith, hope and love that were to follow the recipient in the days ahead.
This friend of mine recounted that it felt very foolish, and had he hesitated he probably would have never done it, yet to the recipient, it became such a blessing that the recipient didn't even want to eat it anymore but instead just keep it as a reminder of what was said, because it was so true, and so meaningful at that point in time.
God knows. Man may think its foolish, but who are we to contend with the God whom know all our thoughts and ways even better than we do ourselves?
I need to learn to be more sensitive and to obey to voice that calls me. Sometimes I hesitate too much I guess and the moment is gone. I let it be gone, and there goes a failed opportunity where God had said 'now' and I had said 'uhm I'm not too sure'. I rationalise. I question myself if it was from God. I (and this probably only for me heh) chide myself for thinking of such a thing that was probably merely to make myself feel good about myself and not really such a good idea.
The more I do it, the lesser I obey, the more insensitive to the Holy Spirit I become, despite the fact that I often ask Him to lead me every step of the way.
This is something I really need to learn. I don't know how to do it really. Its a struggle. Yet I want to try, I want to fight, because I know this is what God calls me towards and so I will.
What do you think?
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Gosh, so late. I just had to finish typing this I guess because I felt that it was important. Well, here's try number one. God sustain me tomorrow!
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