The fight of faith

I havnt been checking facebook (or twitter for that matter) much recently, just the notifications when people tag me, so I dont really know what many of my friends have been saying. I did see this indirectly via zw's blog though heh.

Teo Wei Yang
As a Christian NSF: "give back to Singapore what is Singapore's, and to God what is God's."

The jews weren't all that fond of the taxes back then either eh haha. Its a different currency, one monetary while the other would be time but its not all that different I guess. When pc stood on the beach on the fourth night and pointed across the seas to the island opposite and declared 'this is why you're here, this is why you're a soldier',  I'll admit I did feel a little inspired heh.

I still hardly think theres going to be war, dont think we could actually win a war, and dont think I would be able to bring myself to destroy other lives. But yes maybe it does provide a form a deterrence to others to know we aren't entirely free frag. I dont know. Im not a fan of this whole thing but I do know that defence is a necessity and they'd have to figure out a way to put that in place somehow, whether it actually works or not. So just do lah. I am learning from it I guess.

Hah, actually when you think about it, soldiering skills are alot more useful than all those chemistry things I've learnt heh. Like how in school, teaching is not just to stuff people with knowledge but to build critical thinking and useful skills, so soldiering shan't just be for learning how to be a soldier but to be a better Christian and a better man.


Honestly, we hear the term 'Christian soldier' and 'spiritual warfare' being thrown around alot, and we understand the definition. Yet after some time spent here, I feel a little ashamed to say that I have done well as a Christian soldier.

How hard have you persevered for the gospel?

You carry your full battle order and march. Its heavy, its hot, you're exhausted, but you carry on. You know you cannot fall out because if you do, your friends have to carry you to the end, which would be a burden for them, even more taxing. Your heat rash comes in and your back sears like its on fire. Your body is 39 degrees and you have lost your ability to sweat. You carry on. Not for a few more minutes, but for at least another hour. You reach forward for that final destination, that final goal in which it will be all over and you can put down everything and say I have finished the march. That is of course only the route march. In war, you route march to your destination, then you dont end there but have to attack the enemy. To add on, soldiering was even tougher back in the days of Paul than it is now. This, is the context in which we are called to be Christian soldiers. I'd hardly think I lived up to those standards.

Have you forsaken your all for the gospel?

During confinement period, I was forcibly left without contact with the outside world. The military was my life and my only life. I had no choice but to forsake everything for it. I lived to serve my commanders, to follow their orders. With disobedience comes punishments so no disobedience would be found. The word of my commanders was the law. To be honest, I can't say with all certainty in light of this that I lay everything down for the gospel. God in His great mercies does not punish us for every wrongdoing we do but through grace we are covered. Unfortunately, sometimes punishment seems to work wonders in instilling discipline and making other people do things well. In light of how I have been forced to give my all and more in the military, I have to rethink what I mean everything I say I give my all to God, the one who's perfect standards are far higher and makes military standards look pathetic. Im not sure I dare to say that I have fought for souls as hard as a soldier fights in a war.

Ultimately we aren't perfect people. To expect the perfect standards from us is impossible. It is however very humbling to rethink how much you think you have done for God. If there be any spiritual pride in us, let it be stripped away.

"The test of observance of Christ's teachings is our consciousness of our failure to attain an ideal perfection. The degree to which we draw near this perfection cannot be seen; all we see is the extent of our deviation"
- Leo Tolstoy