With pride we lead - Foxtrot!

I have a computer! A nice change from before.

Being posted here, the first thing we heard was that this coy was famous for being slack, kinda like how jaguar was for BMT. As it turns out though, theres a new OC and we're no longer gonna be a slack coy.

And personally, im fine with that.

I did say previously, three things I pray for in my new placing. Good coy, Christian presence and time. Tough training is alright as long as a work rest balance is struck.

Well, over here its only day three but so far it seems that the commanders are very reasonable people. OC is some super hardcore dude 18 years old sign on special ops, went commando, ranger course, all sorts of shit also have lol. So naturally standards are high, but he's a very reasonable man and I've come to respect him. On day 1 we already kena pump but it wasn't a angry punishment thing but done is a nice manner, and he did it together with us. And our journals that we submitted, he actually read through my entire platoon's and wrote responses to all of us. That is some dedication right there man. I always hear of people saying that the WOs in SCS don't give a damn, but so far this has been untrue. Its only day 3 of course and I can't say for sure yet, but if thats the way this coy will work, the way our OC is gonna be, then that will be so awesome.

If anything, he kinda inspires me. Its funny because we had this NE talk about knowing our neighbours which was an, ahem, very interesting talk about our neighbouring countries and our relationship with them, both now and historical. After that, our OC talked to us more and well, evidently he is very passionate about the purpose of NS and the SAF in general. Heh, admittedly his talk kinda stirred up some patroitism in me and made me think more about why we have to go through NS. He does make alot of sense.

(Ohno what is becoming of me! =O)

For Christian presence, hmm, there's this guy in my section who was from my 5th coy platoon but I never really talked to him. Turns out he is a Chrisitan and I found that out because he was reading his Bible. Someone else noticed that the Bible was a english and chinese two in one version and commented about it and we got into this talk about Christianity where he presented the gospel to the fellow. Interesting. Havn't talked to him much since though, let's see how it goes.

And time, well I am writing this now aren't I heh. We generally have free time after RO and RO isn't too late. Just that we have tasks to accomplish too, like homework and stuff. I like the way SCS works, we are given a task and time to complete by, then we deal with it ourselves. Much more autonomy than BMT days, and more free time accordingly when we get things done well and fast. Having free time at night is great. BMT used to be such a terrible rush and it was particularly dreaful because even at night you weren't spared from trouble from commanders, and we end so late we hardly have admin time anyway and just rush off to sleep and then a new day begins and it all repeats over again. Nothing to really look forward to then. Here at least, there are things to really look forward to.

More than just these three things, I also find more purpose in the things we do here. Recruit life felt meaningless. Here, I feel that the things we do here are actually more applicable. And they teach us properly. Like low rope, we're gonna be experts at that soon enough heh, monkeys. Its pretty fun when its not dumb. And when it comes to warfighting, the things you learn in SCS makes you feel like you can actually fight and win really. Not like BMT, where you'll just die terribly.

Perhaps this is a place I can truly say I have pride in being a part of.

Im not perfectly okay yet though. Theres still parts of me feel out of place. Whenever I feel tired, the mental lethargy also sets in and I still feel trapped in a job I don't want to have. And this is only the beginning, can't imagine when the really tough training starts. Part of me still feels like im not living life to the fullest potential and im afraid I will continue to live this dysfunctional life, with time inside being the prison and time outside being the only reality. I know its unhealthy, but I can't seem to make myself snap out of it.

Doing my best to keep my eyes on Jesus. To serve with the best of my ability for I am serving Him. To see all these beyond their physical representations and seek God's purpose for me in it all. SCS will be a new challenge. In many ways, I have neglected the things of God quite a fair bit in the course of BMT, in part my own fault, in part because it really couldn't be done. So here's to a commitment to offer up this life to Christ, to fully live the risen life. With extra time at night, its easily to slip into doing other things, but no, I will choose to seek Him.

Let's see how this goes.