Rat race

I have been pondering about this for awhile, and now have made up my mind. Its physically impossible to pursue an excellent CAP while juggling my many other responsibilities. When I sit down and think about it, CAP score isnt that useful actually. To graduate from NUS biz school with honours alone would be enough. Sure first class honours is always better, but its not worth the sacrifices.

This is crazy, but it means I will have to deliberately make decisions to not work that hard.

But its necessary. Im not even at peak period yet, and the cost has already been too great in the pursuit of academics.

I've been in the rat race for years. All my schooling life I have prioritised academics very highly in my life, perhaps because I felt it was the one thing I was at least decently good at.

I expect it will be difficult to break the habit, being worried that im lagging behind or having the nagging feeling that im underperfoming and all that, so it may take awhile, but I hope that eventually i may fully be able to break free from the need to do well, and truly let my life be driven by eternity.